More Quick Tips to Avoid the Holiday Meltdown this Year

  More Quick Tips to Avoid the Holiday Meltdown this Year Dr. Laura Dabney  here again with Tyler.   Here are More Quick Tips to Avoid the Holiday Meltdown this Year. yes you have it every year you know it and we want to help you avoid the holiday meltdown in general we’ve been talking about how to straighten out that imbalance which leads to that below upper meltdown and we want to emphasize for the summer summation is the intimacy involves giving and taking right think about it you’re giving something somebody else and taking something return is the ultimate intimacy if you’ve got it in your head that you have to give give give give that’s we make people happy and they’re automatically and give back to you you’re gonna be disappointed yes that’s gonna come right so go ahead take and give and your finding of a much more intimate holiday season this year for sure happy holidays everybody loved like that so long and we’ll catch you next time. Hope these Tips to Avoid the Holiday Meltdown from Dr. Laura Dabney help!

Beyond Boundaries– Simple Fixes for your Relationship Problems

we’re back it’s voting Tuesday we are here to talk  Beyond Boundaries and give  Simple Fixes for Your Relationship Problems absolutely yes so we’re not here to help you with the political problems because that can get kind of fiery but we do have some tips on how to fix your relationship problems.  these are the quicker tips we give beyond just boundary setting which is huge! But we have talked about boundary setting quite a bit but it’s here is our introduction.  I’m Doctor Dabney relationship psychiatrist and this is Joelle Brant relationship coach. We’re here to try to help you be a little less, you know, weird about coming in to see us or anybody to help you with your emotional relationship problems.  This is  sort of like us opening our front door and saying come on in this is let me talk about this what we do this our imperfections and hopefully make you a bit more comfortable. so we have talked about boundary setting and we’ve discussed the basic boundary setting method is “I feel X when you do Y so I need you to please stop.” there’s some other quick down and dirty statements you can make to stop some troublesome patterns in your relationship. so we thought we’d go over those today. the one we talk about a lot is walking away but a little part to that you have to add that’s because walking away is a little passive-aggressive if you’re in the middle of something or your partner is in the middle of something and you walk away you’re gonna stir them up because they’re not gonna know where you are  or why you just left. Or if  you coming back, that’s sort of hurtful to them so we talked about using a bridge statement. right,  you can say I’m gonna leave this is getting a little too much but let’s revisit it after dinner. Exactly so that little statement keeps it from being torture for the other person okay now there are times when walking away without a statement is appropriate so the first example walking away with a bridge statement is if someone’s being inappropriately aggressive name-calling you know yeah the other yelling gets to be too high whenever you get to that you know that anxiety discomfort like mmm it’s not working for me check in later okay but …

Are You Self Sabotaging Your Intimate Relationship? Find Out!

  Self sabotaging your intimate relationship, are you doing it? Today they discuss the question, are you self sabotaging your intimate relationship without knowing? Sometimes we do not realize we are self sabotaging.  We’re back, it must be Tuesday! Yes! Dr. Laura Dabney relationship psychiatrist with Joelle Brant relationship coach and we are here this is our welcome mat to help you everybody out there who is maybe shy or embarrassed or ashamed to get help for an emotional or relationship problem yeah we’re trying to make that go away in short we help executive men with their relationship problems but you know we like everybody to feel comfortable with this process so here we are and we’ve been talking about the hidden relationship patterns that are hurting your relationships that are toxic okay so in general if there’s a so we’re going to talk about a relationship patterns we’re not talking about arguments okay this is a little different this is the ongoing what do you want basic low-grade problems that you just haven’t addressed issues are concerned that you keep quiet about just because you don’t want to make waves exactly you don’t rock the boat or you can put it off another time so the feelings are not I mean it can be anger but typically we’re talking about feelings that are more subtle like walking on eggshells or being annoyed or bored even if it’s a big one yeah that’s going on guess what it’s your problem how many times we have people come in say my husband and my wife she just goes that other than their problems their problems look if there’s a chronic problem in your relationship either you’re causing it or you’re not stopping it not addressing it is a problem it’s exactly exactly and it keeps it going so it’s a problem so you don’t have to change the spouse that’s the good news you can change how you’re dealing with this pattern we’re not dealing with it and stop it okay and the reason so the reason why I would say people don’t tip do this if people are caught in a rut and have not addressed it in a way to get to stop it it’s because they value one  approach over the other right they approach either the aggressive they value either the aggressive approach or the passive …

Hidden Toxic Relationship Patterns

It is a runny-nose day! hello Dr. Laura Dabney and relationship coach Joelle Brant coming to you live talking about, well we help executive men with their relationship problems or power couples with their relationship problems but we’re on a mission to help everybody get some help with emotional or relationship problems trying to help you overcome any shame or guilt or anxiety you have about that it’s sort of like our welcome mat to  welcome you in to show you how we look and we talk to you about the same things we talk to each other about.  yeah in here and to our patients  we always ask for people to send in questions mm-hmm we’ve been hearing from lots of you so thank you I was just telling Joelle I got a message from Sam in Chesapeake wanting us to talk about toxic relationship patterns.  Hidden! Yes HIDDEN toxic relationship patterns. I mean I hope none of you are going duh and there was an obvious toxic relationship patterns. I don’t want to assume anything is obvious but there are some that we when you say or  we talk about, that people don’t see or it’s hard for them to see when you point it out, so yes so those the ones who want to talk about. Someone is calling right now! Is it Lola with more food?  we hit the mother load today Lola is Joelle’s mother she brought us all these tasty treats Thank You Lola, too many but thank you it’s true okay yep so we’re happy about that. um that’s toxic food treats so the toxic relationship patterns and I thought was a good segue because we talked last week about dealing with toxic people in your life mhm and really it’s sort of the flip side of that because with toxic people in your life you have to get a little distance with putting up a boundary or leaving if they’re really toxic but this is where you can make a change in the pattern yourself. so things will improve you don’t have to change or put distance for the other person you can make a change which will bring you closer to that person because the toxic pattern is in the way. so let’s talk about them well you know what that’s I can actually there’s probably at least three categories here …

The Secret Reason we Keep Letting ‘Em Get the Best of Us

hi it’s not Tuesday no we were here on Tuesday but as good as Joelle looks she sounds terrible hi guys I have  laryngitis going on this is actually better than yesterday!  so we wanted to wait see if Joelle’s voice came back otherwise I gotta be ventriloquist for you little whiteboard I’ll start writing things down so I’ve Doc Laura dad I was forget the intro dr. Lorenz I have any relationship psychiatrists Joe well Brandon relationship coach and we’re here what we do is we help executive men with their relationship problems but we’re here and as a way to help people be less tend to do less poorly Timman therapist nervous about coming in to get help when you have an emotional relationship problem because as we say every time people nobody leaves without saying I wish I’d done this earlier right so don’t be that person come on in this is our welcome mat we’re talking you in this is who we are is what we do it’s what we chat about every day so we’re decided we wanted to talk about why people ask us these questions all the time in session you know why why don’t why do I keep letting him take me over or call over me walk all over me why can I stand up for myself right you know what these kind of and people often bring up self esteem and self esteem is part of it but there’s a secret reason that we see oh all the time and I call it well I call these the enemy emotions okay so there are people who don’t see their emotions as normal natural biological yeah but more that they divided them up into there are good emotions and bad emotions and they’re since bad emotions they shouldn’t feel them or wrong yeah not just uncomfortable but they were actually wrong right they’re wrong they’re they’re the enemy so the emotion becomes the enemy yeah and it distracts them from the problem actually ironically so if there’s a problem or a person’s a problem they see they feel anger and then suddenly that’s bad that’s wrong it’s mean well half a dozen reasons why they can’t let that be in their head I mean we just how about your head not how am I saying anything at this point I’m just …