Men, Emotions, and Mental Health Myths

 

Men and emotions and mental health myths.

We’re live again!! Hi happy Tuesday! Tuesday feels like a Monday for me, double Monday.

Double Monday week that’s not good. Why are we doing this? We are this doing this to help you understand what we do!

Did we explain why were wanted to do this?

We talked about a couple things. your hair, your kids, but really what we’re talking about is what it’s like to be  someone in mental health. Also about men and their masculinity.

So that’s really what that’s what we’re talking about right because it’s so much.

I think it’s really misunderstood, what it’s like to have a mental health problem. It is not always a disorder but it may be health or emotional problem and what getting help is like.

There is a huge amount of misconception about that so we’re just trying to put some of that to rest.

We want to break the myths and the stigma and that people think it’s really scary or they’re so afraid to come in.  As we mentioned in one of our videos we want to be a little bit more approachable.

Let us make it a little bit easier, less fearful to come in and learn. Learn about you !!! I mean, not knowing about yourself is like not knowing the third floor of your house. By not understanding your emotions and where they come from you miss out on so much information about yourself.

Here is a quick recap of last week. we touched about you know the three negative emotions that people mostly don’t deal with or know how to deal with anger, neediness, and sadness.

Say it with us anger, neediness, sadness, are not bad things!! they’re not bad feelings!

We always mention these emotions that people are trying to hide.

those are the people who think they that those are a problem they shouldn’t have, that’s the source of most emotional problems right there.

yeah so we see that a lot we probably talked about that a lot and then I added that one post about how we see.   Even  though we see that in both men and women.  there are some differences we see in men and women in that regard and I wrote a little post about that that got a little attention

I would say how would I sum that up this way. I think I would say that in our society there’s still a stigma that makes it hard for men to emote and still keep their masculinity

so that’s what I was talking about I like my how women have come a long way with their ability to emote.

of course I think that’s always been easier or more acceptable for women but we had trouble with our aggression.

back in the latter century in the Dark Ages before you were born.

But from awhile ago you know what came a long way so now we can be in the workforce.  Women can go for gold medals.   They  can be on sports teams and all that.   So I think we’ve bridged the gap on aggression and passivity or emoting in action.

I think men haven’t caught up with us in terms of their ability to emote and feel their masculinity intact.

So that’s why we have pretty much devoted our attention to executive men with relationship problems because they have this history with society.

Society makes it it even more complicated for men.   They are encouraged to be aggressive they’re rewarded for being aggressive in the workplace. But at home or with an intimate relationship either they act aggressive and they get in trouble.

Or they get really passive and get in trouble because then they aren’t able to say what they really want or need.   Men Emotions Mental Health Myths and Misconceptions are a problem!

With women the emotional problems, the differences we see there are because sometimes women have trouble emoting too.  We think even though for me at least in what I’ve been dealing with lately it might surprise you but you do think sometimes it’s they have trouble with neediness.

yeah even though you can think of all the I know stereotypical like needy women wanting all these things.   A  lot of the people that I’ve spoken to they think neediness is a bad thing.

So they always are trying to please everyone. Whether it’s their family their friends their significant other without worrying about themselves.

 

They don’t realize that it’s okay to be needy even though you know everyone has needs right and they’re supposed to need others.   That kind of goes against the old I would say stereotype where women you know we’re better for being needy or encouraged to be needy.

Like that the husband had to take care of the wife yes encouraged the past passivity was feminine back in the day so here’s an example where a sort of bucks that trend where they’re uncomfortable with expressing needs even though we know they’re normal.   Men Emotions Mental Health Myths and Misconceptions

Women you know they can emote, they’re so good at emoting but we see that it’s a conflict for them a lot of the time too with anger.
Anger, of anger with children with their kids sometimes yeah that’s where I see a difference.

 

so I think women who feel angry difficulty expressing anger because they feel it’s not feminine.  They think it is not right or  not the right thing to do. Men Emotions Mental Health Myths and Misconceptions

whereas men actually are terrified that their anger is gonna turn into something physical.  yeah so that’s a little bit different.   I don’t see that with women so much they’re afraid they’re gonna get physical and actually kill or hurt somebody.   Men just really think it’s me like to a hundred that they’re gonna admit I feel anger and then they will kill someone.

so it’s really they have to slow that down and I think it’s hard for men or for anybody.

They think that think that anger is zero to a hundred.

It’s because usually they’ve seen that in the past that “oh when my dad got angry he got angry!”

So to them that’s where they got that mindset that anger is uncontrollable versus realizing that okay when they got angry they talked about it and it was okay because it was a natural emotion.

they’re sort of what we call identifying with the father. Like, I’m going to be like that yeah be like
him and go from feeling anger what they didn’t realize and we have to teach them.

what they’re seeing is the tip of the iceberg.  The father probably buried everything.  And then blew up you know, so he missed the whole preamble.

we have to teach them that no in fact it is the opposite.   If you do not deal with the anger that is when you will explode. But if you deal with the anger as it comes you won’t reach that level and you won’t lose control.

I still have to remind myself that every day. that’s why we’re here to make that an easier process for everybody to understand and you know it wouldn’t it be nice if every lay person really
understood what we understand.  Thank you for joining us again today!  If you have any questions or comments please call us at 757-340-8800 or email us at office@lauradabney.com