Setting Boundaries

Good Boundaries Make Good Relationships A lot of people may think boundaries are mean because they view them as a separating thing. Another way people may view them is as “rules.” It’s important to know that boundaries are very critical in a good relationship, but they are not meant to separate or set rules. What they are intended for is to help people understand, what works for you and what doesn’t. Boundaries let people know when they’re intruding. Nice Ways to Set up Boundaries When setting boundaries with others: Kindly set the boundary Know the different levels Enforce them with constructive aggression What happens when somebody dismisses a boundary? Or when they don’t acknowledge or care about the boundary? When someone doesn’t respect your boundary, use constructive aggression to make sure you are being taken seriously. For example saying, “when you talk about that subject, it bothers me.” When stating this, it is setting up a boundary by letting the other person know that the subject they are speaking of, bother’s you. If the other person responds with something similar to, “It’s no big deal,” enforcing your boundary by replying with “I know you don’t understand it, but this is really important to me.” This lets the other person know that you are serious, and this boundary is just that, a BOUNDARY. Setting Boundaries in a Relationship People suffer for years or wait for a crisis to seek help. But once they get the support, they often wonder, “why didn’t I start this sooner?” No one can read anyone’s mind; that is why setting boundaries and communicating them to others is essential. Do not expect your partner to read your mind, be sure to inform your partner. In a relationship, when one person starts setting boundaries, a lot of the time, the partner starts getting better at setting them too. To learn more, go to where you will find free self-help articles.

Grand Opening in Richmond!!

so we are live from Dr. Dabney’s grand opening of her Richmond office currently right now I’m just standing in one of the offices here I’ll just flip this around to show you guys looks amazing in here doing like a quick little video of everything right and in here we have dr. Daphne’s office these little guys are probably the cutest little thing they’re little men or at least they look like little men so this is the one on the clock and then we have our guy here it’s amazing [Music] one of our private offices here guys [Music] nice little waiting area this is Tyler’s office very nice this is my favorite piece of artwork right here it’s our little mannequin guy I think he’s pretty awesome where she depending on what you want to call it and then just looks right out got some really nice designs here in the office and I’ll be tagging the designer in the post here soon also if you headed over to our Instagram page she is also going to be tagged in a bunch of photos there this is Brad Joelle’s husband everybody we’re live in the Richmond office time here exactly you’ve got Joelle over here in the corner and you guys want to introduce yourselves with Andrew the underpart be anywhere Beauty mush a wedding hair maybe tagging them on Instagram and Facebook as well for their lovely work today guys trust me a piece of art right here oh oh yeah what’s your destiny what’s your death there you go Tyler we’re gonna head on over to our other two here so she’s the head woman in charge over here hi everybody our little good video from the Richmond office again address is one one five four five nickels sure Road scuse me Richmond Virginia we’re just opening up so if you have anybody in the area looking for a psychiatrist or a life coach definitely reach out to us we definitely take referrals and things of that nature so look us up find us give us a call if you need our number it’s gonna be posted later I hope you guys enjoyed this as much as I have cuz I absolutely love doing these and I hope that you guys will take a chance and come look at us we also have the office …

Tips on How to Make a Marriage Last

Q&A with Dr. Dabney on how to make a marriage last   Dr. Dabney treats marriages but not always the couple. She sometimes treats one person in the marriage, which fixes the marriage. That’s one hint if you need help, you’ve got to get it. Dr. Dabney has been married for 27 years and is offering tips on how to make a marriage last.   Joelle: How do you make a marriage last 27 years or even one year? Dr. Dabney: There is no magic bullet to get you through all of the problems you will face. If you need help, go and get it. Daryl and I got help when we needed it. We had parenting disagreements, and it wasn’t easy. It’s never easy to ask for help, but the relief and the amount of trouble you overcome is so worth it. It’s almost silly not to get help because we made so much progress so fast. And I do not think we would be as happy as we are now in our marriage if we didn’t get that help.   Joelle: Do you have any premarital advice? Dr. Dabney: If the couple starts by having the understanding that they’re going to get help when they need it, then it becomes more automatic. Instead of saying “oh my god, we need help, something’s wrong with us,” it just becomes more second nature.   Get the Help You Need People think our lives are perfect, but we’re not perfect. Just because we’re focusing on other peoples problems, does not mean our lives are perfect. In fact, a lot of what we teach is because we’ve been in the trenches, and we’ve come out of it. That gives us another perspective on how to work through these things, besides book knowledge and training.  We’re not here to judge you. We’ve been there, or we have relatives or friends who have. People think that therapy will take forever to see results, but the sooner you come in and get the work done, the sooner you can feel better and reap the rewards. Some people come in for one session to make a plan, or if we are not the right fit, we will refer you to someone who we think is a better fit. Ways we can help you: Dozens of free articles  15-minute consultation to provide direction (757) 340-8800 An online …

How Couples Can Talk About Financial Problems Without Arguing

We are LIVE from Dr. Laura Dabney’s Virginia Beach Office!! we are Live!!  hey everyone Dr. Dabney and Joelle Brant here we are just starting to get used to using Facebook live so if we start starting your first ever Facebook live woohoo there is something we are actually excited about right now we actually do pretty good news but I get a talk to a reporter at Huffington Post yesterday about how patients can have people couples can talk about financial problems without arguing so that’s good and that’ll be out we’re gonna get the link for that soon so we’ll share that as soon as we have it awesome I’m excited actually Joelle has other news she’s not sharing she’s showing off her new hairstyle I did yes I did I got my where’s the fair coz mine’s a mess I did I actually went to escape blow-dry bar and salon on Laskin Road on Virginia Beach and Yolanda right did my hair you know I’ll definitely link her in on this but yeah I see the before and after I’ll send you guys and share the before now sure I did I did play will talk to you on Tuesday were you know Tuesday and Thursdays live and thanks for joining us        

Avoid the Holiday Meltdown

  Want to know how to Avoid the holiday meltdown this year? We’re talking about the holiday meltdown to hopefully set in new habits for the next holiday. People struggle with the holidays because they’re so focused on pleasing others. By creating scenarios of how they think the holiday is going to go if they do not give others what they want. There’s this fantasy that you’re going to hurt somebody, or someone is going to be angry or upset because you didn’t give them what they wanted. Children need to learn that they’re not going to get everything they want for the rest of their lives, and adults should certainly be able to handle this. Let go of that fantasy, and see what really happens. How to Handle the Holiday Meltdown Start talking about the problem or the holiday meltdown in advance. Ask yourself, how the holiday went last year and what you can do now, to avoid the holiday going bad. People get stuck in thinking they have to do a tradition or they’re going to feel bad later. You can not fix a future problem later. The thought process, ” If I don’t see them now, then I am going to feel bad or guilty later.” You are going to feel guilty and sad later because that is a part of life. What Causes the Holiday Meltdown? There are feelings that people have labeled as bad, and feelings that people have labeled as good. There is no such thing. Anger, sadness, neediness are all normal. If you already have issues with these feelings, during the holidays they will get worse. If you think you can’t feel sad any other day of the week, you’re definitely going to think you shouldn’t feel sad during the holidays. That is nonsense, feelings don’t take a hiatus during the holidays, you have to allow yourself the time to process that emotion, whatever the enemy emotion is. There is absolutely nothing wrong with saying, I am going to go take a walk, or a nap- whatever it is that you need to do, to get that feeling processed. If you can do this in advance, even better! Be Prepared Maybe you get sad about the loss of a parent every holiday, or a child who can’t come home. Go ahead and say this in advance to your family members. Such as, “It …